Third Graduate of SO House 3 – TJ

The third woman graduated from the SO house 3 today. Where do I begin with TJ? TJ entered the house rubbing everyone in her life the wrong way, except for her husband. She had no friends, no social life and she was completely lonely. The phrase that I can best use to describe her is “I don’t know”, that is what her life was full of…I don’t knows. She didn’t know what she did to rub people the wrong way, she didn’t know how to connect with people, she didn’t know she took control of every situation she was ever in and she didn’t know that she made herself the center of attention with no regards to the people around her. I would have to say that TJ was one of the most annoying people I have ever encountered in my life and you have to remember that I was watching her on TV, I wasn’t actually in her presence. TJ came from a life of challenges and I attribute her life of loneliness to that. Not only was TJ abused as a child but she has ADHD and dyslexia. She dropped out of high school because of her disorders and decided to get a GED. She had huge challenges with her housemates when she entered the house. The first day in the house she took control of their first group exercise and totally alienated herself because everyone was overwhelmed by her. TJ’s goal in the house was Learn to Connect and her steps were give up control, face the loneliness, learn the do’s and don’ts of communication and embrace intimacy. TJ overcame a lot of obstacles while in the house and really learned how to communicate and connect with her housemates. I thought that TJ would be the last of the original six women to graduate from the SO house but she made great strides and is a completely different person than when she entered the house. She can now hold a conversation with a person instead of being the entire conversation, she can take into consideration other peoples suggestions and she has friends who know who the real TJ is. On top of that I think that I could be in a room with her for more than two seconds.

Second Graduate of SO House 3 – Allison

After a three week hiatus and SO withdrawal for me, my favorite daytime reality TV show returned to the air with new episodes. The second woman graduated from the SO house 3 today. Allison came into SO house 2, last season, as a breast cancer survivor. She had been diagnosed with breast cancer a few months earlier and had undergone a radical left breast mastectomy for an apple sized tumor. Allison’s goal in house 2 was to Learn to Live. During her stay in the SO house 2 she had to face her “squatters”, representations of how she really felt about herself. Her “squatters” included worthlessness, fat, ugly, deformed and the list goes on. The chemotherapy she had undergone for the breast cancer had caused her to gain a lot of weight and lose all her red hair which grew back black and grey. Not only did she have to face her “squatters” but she was forced to look at her abusive past and how it had effected her. During her stay at house 2 she had genetic testing done to see if she had the breast cancer gene, the test results were positive, which meant she had a 60 to 80 percent chance of getting cancer again. Allison was the final graduate of SO house 2 and left having made the decision to have her other breast, ovaries and uterus removed to ensure she would not get cancer again. Allison returned to the SO house again this year to recover mentally from all the surgeries she underwent between the two seasons. Upon arrival at this years house it was evident that Allison had regressed into her old habits of beating herself up. On top of that, she still had not completely faced the abuse she endured as a child of an alcoholic and she has racked up a substantial amount of debt due to all the medical bills. Allison’s goal in this SO house was Living Large and her steps were learn the art of balance, discover love through self acceptance, get finances in order and clarify vision for the future. She finally faced the abuse and actually held a “funeral” to bury the alcoholism, the abuse, the possibility of having children, the breasts that she will never have and much more…she let go of the past. She also took a look at her financial situation and came up with a plan to conquer the debt. Last but not least, she realized that she was meant to work for a non-profit organization and use her story and strength to help other people. She had the opportunity to go to Texas and help the survivors of Hurricane Katrina weeks after the tragedy occurred and work with the Magic Johnson Foundation and was given a internship with MJF as her graduation gift. Allison is one of the most caring people I have ever seen and I really do believe that she will help many people throughout her life, it’s just what she is meant to do. She has already touched so many peoples lives in the two SO houses she has been in, now all she has to do is be willing to accept the love that she gives to so many others and I believe she is well on her way. I don’t know how Allison is going to do out of the SO house, she still has a lot of work to do but I really do believe that she has all the tools she needs, all she needs to do is use them.

First Graduate of SO House 3 – Jessica

The first woman graduated yesterday from the SO house 3. For those of you that don’t watch SO, I will give you a little background history on Jessica. Jessica’s mother was her best friend, her confidant, the center of her life and the only person she completely trusted to see her true self. Jessica’s mother was in the second plane that hit the towers on September 11, 2001. Jessica lived and worked in NY when this tragedy happened and unfortunately was very close when everything was happening. When she heard that the second plane that hit the towers was a flight to California she called her father to see if he had heard anything about her mother’s flight. Her father at the time did not know anything other than what Jessica knew but shortly after, she heard the flight number and knew it was her mother’s plane. Since 9/11 Jessica had quit everything she had ever loved, given up on all relationships and shut everyone in her life out. She was completely miserable and was so racked full of grief that she could no longer function in the real world. When 9/11 came around she did everything she could to get away from the reminders of that tragic day, which was pretty much impossible seeing she still lived in NY. On top of that, she felt that her father had betrayed her because he didn’t know how to be there for her and he moved on with his life, he got remarried. Jessica’s goal in the house was Healing Personally through Public Tragedy and her steps were to grieve the loss of her mother, move beyond 9/11, rediscover family and become the center of her own life. I really thought that Jessica would have the biggest challenge and be one of the last of the original six women to graduate just because her story and history are so painful. She poured every ounce of herself into every exercise she was given, no matter how painful. She realized that her mother is still with her and that she did die a tragic death but that the grief was hers, not the whole nation’s like she felt it had become. She spent 9/11 helping to build a home, with Habitat for Humanity, for a family so that they could start over. She had a hard “talk” with her father and his new wife and vowed to be present in their relationship and accept the love that both of them had to offer. Finally she reconnected with her artistic side, she began shooting photography again (her mother bought her first camera and really pushed her to utilize her talent) and made a gallery of photos in the house that merged her painful past with the present day. Jessica also decided that she no longer wanted to live in NY and she plans on staying in LA to start this new part of her life.

Reality TV

I am a HUGE reality TV fan. Yes I know some people out there think that it kills brain cells every time you watch a reality TV show but I watch them all the time so I guess I have a lot of brain cells to spare. Some of the shows that I watch had their season finale’s this week or are having them today and I feel like giving my two cents. Where to begin… Starting Over: Most of you probably have not heard of this wonderful reality TV show, the reason, it comes on during the day. I got into SO when I quit my first job out of college.

Pretty much it is a house full of women that have their own problem (coping with losing a family member on 9/11, trying to become independent of parent’s at 40, trying to create a life away from stripping, etc, etc) that are there to start their life over and live a more fulfilled life. I find that I get a good life lesson from each show and of course I enjoy the fact that it is a reality TV show. For you buffs out there, check it out, it might strike your fancy.

The Biggest Loser: I was really excited to see another female (Suzy) in the mix and that she came within a pound of taking second place. I pretty much knew that Matt was going to win just because of how great he looked and the fact that he weighed more than Seth to start with. However, I do wonder if he lost the weight in a healthy way. If any of you know a wrestler, it is stuck in their brain to just starve yourself and run and you can lose weight in a heartbeat. Seeing Matt has gotten back into wrestling I do wonder if he lost the weight the way he was supposed to. I guess it doesn’t matter because all of the final three got to walk away with some money. Getting away from the final three I do have to say that I was astonished with both Pete and Doc’s weight loss. Talk about an insane amount of weight and Matt would have had no chance if he had been up against either of them. The Amazing Race: I will post more about TAR next week after the final on Tuesday. Hopefully it will be a good post but that is all dependent on who wins. It is down to the final three families; the Linz’s, the Bransen’s and the Weaver’s. I CAN’T STAND THE WEAVER’S. I think that they are the biggest hypocrites on the face of this planet. They talk about how they are just trying to live a good Christian life and they don’t understand why people don’t like them. Hello idiots, all you do is make fun of people, stab other teams in the back and alienate yourselves. I was through with them when they started making fun of the Paolo family on how they posed in front of a garbage truck. OK, yeah that wouldn’t necessarily be my first choice of where to pose but the father of that family is proud of what he does. He found a way to support his family and has done so for the last twenty years, there is no reason to talk shit about him because he is proud of his profession. So needless to say I don’t want the Weaver’s to win. I would like to see the Linz’s win but I will be OK if the Bransen’s win.

America’s Next Top Model: I am starting to lose enthusiasm for ANTM. More for the reason that my favorite has never won. This season it came down to Nicole and Nik. I really wanted Nik to win because I thought she was more genuine than Nicole. Frankly, Nicole drove me up a freakin’ wall and I wanted to slam her face against that same wall. I really think that this is one show that AMERICA should vote on. It should be like American Idol where they do their shoots and we hear the judges critiques but we, the American’s, vote on who should “continue on in the running to becoming America’s Next Top Model”. Otherwise I think the name of the show needs to be change because America really doesn’t have anything to do with picking their Next Top Model. Anyways, I think that Nicole will be a great model but it just boils down to I didn’t like her and I wanted Nik to win, maybe next year the girl I like will finally win.

Survivor: Oh Lord, what to say about this season of Survivor. Talk about massive stabbing in the back, pretty much thanks to Stephenie. I guess she figured that seeing she didn’t get a chance to make any alliances last year, she would go ahead and try and screw everyone so that she didn’t leave herself a chance to win. So tonight is the final and I am really looking forward to the reunion because that should be full of some heated discussions. I hope that Rafe and Danni stick together and end up taking each other to the final two but who knows what is going to happen. Stephenie seems to have so much influence that she may talk them into voting against each other and ensure herself a spot in the final two, not that she will win. She has made so many enemies, that are now sitting on the jury, that if she does get to the final two I would be shocked if anyone voted for her. I felt so bad for Steph last year but now I really don’t like her. I would be OK if Lydia won but I just feel that she has rode coat tails the whole time and really doesn’t deserve to win, what is a fishmonger anyways? More tomorrow after I see the finale tonight, I just hope it is Rafe or Danni.

Well that is all my reality TV shows that have just ended or are ending soon. However, American Idol starts in January so I will be able to get my reality TV fix until the others start up again. I plan on making an American Idol post weekly to give my opinion on the show and the judges comments. I would have done that for these shows but I started the blog much too late. Till next time…